How Can I Help My Kids Stop Lying?

“Honey, why are you sitting under the dining room table eating an entire cake?” a mom told me she had to ask her five year-old daughter in the middle of the night.  “Satan woke me up and told me to come eat it, Mommy!”

All children experiment at some point with lying.  Don’t worry, when yours does. She needs firm, consistent boundaries, no matter how cute she is or entertaining her lies are, like the girl in the previous story.  She needs consequences every time... 

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How to Help Kids in Light of the News Today

A CBS News article today said there have been at least 11 school shootings in the U.S. since January 1.  And the one that happened yesterday was very close to our community here at Daystar, with our camp being an hour or so away, and Melissa having her first youth director job at Calvert City, Kentucky.  With at least 11 this month only, the likelihood is that one has been close to your community, as well.

What do we do?  How do we love and protect the kids we love so dearly?  What do we say, in light of such tragedy, especially tragedy that was perpetrated by someone close to their age...

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Planting Pansies

I love pansies.  Several years ago, I had an encounter with a few pansies that changed my perspective.  

It was a fall day a lot like today, and I was out for a walk with a dear friend.  As we were walking, of course, we were talking.  I think we were talking about something painful in one of our lives…and how hard it is to understand sometimes, and how to keep moving in the midst.  And then I saw the pansies...

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AMKOT - Girls and Resourcefulness Part One

I believe girls are inherently resourceful.  They’re adventurous and insightful and capable and strong…often much more than we give them credit for.  But, as a counselor for over two decades, I believe that the resourcefulness of girls today is a disappearing commodity.  What’s happening? What’s changing?  And why?  Again, as in many of these milestones, some of it has to do with them…and much of it has to do with those of us who love them... 

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"Are My Kids on Track?" FALL Update

Pat yourself on the back.   Treat yourself to a fancy cup of coffee.  You did it!  

You made it past the first few weeks of school, and that’s not an easy feat.   For all the years we’ve been working with kids and families, we’ve consistently seen how difficult that transition can be for so many kids and parents.  A new teacher, new friends, new routine, new expectations...

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Are My Kids on Track: Kids and Resourcefulness

Over fifty years ago, a developmental psychologist, by the name of Michael Lewis, researched gender differences using one-year olds.  Lewis and his colleagues set up a barrier between a child and mother.   The barrier created physical separation, but the child was able to see the mother.   They then cued the mother to begin showing evidence of distress - crying, sighing, etc.  

Most of the boys attempted to tear down the barrier, whereas most girls stood and wept.  Lewis remarked on how the boys wanted to get back to their mothers, even if...

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Technology Tuesday: An Open Letter (Challenge) To Teenagers with Cell Phones

I was recently meeting with a young woman in high school I respect very much.  I already did respect her when she told me the following story.  Now, I respect her even more.  She’s swimming upstream in this age of technology.  And I wanted her to write a Technology Tuesday because I believe her thoughts…her passion and her commitment can help the teenagers you love.  Actually, they might can help us all learn to be better stewards not only of technology, but relationships.

In our daily lives, we are constantly surrounded by technology. Everywhere we go phones, laptops, and other devices are always in use. Not long ago, phones were used for a means of communication, and that was it. Now phones are more commonly used for social media purposes. Weather it be snapchat, twitter, or Instagram, people close themselves off from the world and instead engage in what’s on their screens...

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What Do We Do With Summer?

What do we do with the summer?  I want my daughter to have an old-fashioned summer, where she’s spending more time outside and in real relationships than on screen and in virtual ones.

“My daughter does better with structure.”  I hear this sentence constantly in my counseling office.  But, I also hear girls who talk about feeling overwhelmed, over-stressed and over-scheduled.  So, what’s the balance?  How do you help your daughter find enough time to play and grow her imagination...

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Are My Kids on Track: Girls and Perspective Part One

We are only 5 days away from the release of "Are My Kids on Track?" Have you pre-ordered your copy yet? We are so excited to share this new parenting resource with each of you! Nashville, we would love to see you, on Tuesday night, February 14, at the book release party! It will be from 6-9pm, at K. McCarthy, in Green Hills.  There will be book signing, festive treats, holiday shopping, and give-aways!

Today, we hear from Sissy, in the book on Girls and Perspective.  This will be a two-part series so tune in next week for the second half...

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Are My Kids on Track: Boys & Emotions

For the next several weeks, we are excited to share some ideas from our upcoming book, Are My Kids on Track?   We'll be looking at some important emotional, social and spiritual milestones we want to help our kids progress toward.  We'll start today with a conversation about boys and emotions.   

It feels important to first dispel a myth about boys and emotions. The myth is girls have more emotions than boys. That couldn’t be farther from the truth... 

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Technology Tuesday: New Year, New Media Plans for Your Family

The New Year has started and we’re gearing up for lots of things at Raising Boys and Girls.  We’ll be continuing our blog, with Technology Tuesdays and parenting tips.  We’re coming out on the road to hopefully get to meet YOU at one of our parenting events! We’re having lots of fun and giveaways on InstagramFacebook and Twitter.  We are most excited about the launch of our new book coming out NEXT WEEK...

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Technology Tuesday: App Alert - Monogram Lite

It’s amazing how easily our kids can find their way to content we don’t want them to see.  We can’t say enough how important it is that we check out what they’re wanting to install on their phones and gadgets…and not just glance at, but really explore.

A mom came up to me at a recent conference warning me about an app called Monogram Lite.  She said her daughter downloaded it and it appeared harmless.  Basically, it’s an app that lets you put your monogram on different designs and images…

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Girls, Boys & Empathy

How can I help my kids learn to be more empathetic?

Girls can be, by nature, very empathetic.  They are highly intuitive and relational creatures.  When we were writing Raising Girls, we heard story after story of girls who were in tune and responsive to the needs of others around them.  You’ve seen it yourself.  Your daughter is running toward the soccer goal kicking the ball.  Her friend falls down behind her.  What does she do?  She forgets the ball and goes back to help her friend.  However, the closer they get toward adolescence, the more these girls also evolve into narcissistic creatures.

What can you do?  How can you help instill empathy now and maintain it through the turbulent teen years...

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Technology Tuesday: Asterisks and Affection

“I wasn’t sure how I could help, but what I really wanted to do was hug him.”

But not just hug—it was more like *hug*.  

“What does the asterisk mean?”

“It’s when the role play starts.  I wanted to hug him, so when I typed asterisks, it was like I virtually hugged him.  And then things took a bad turn from there..."

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How Does Your Child Feel About Shots?

In the past, we’ve talked about anxiety and kids on several different occasions.  Kids can have anxiety around all manner of issues, from going to school to spending the night out to shots.  In fact, shots are one we see many kids (and adults) struggle with consistently.  If your child has trouble with shots and those dreaded vaccinations are looming on the horizon, check out this article...

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Technology Tuesday: Disney Circle

When we’re teaching on Taming the Technology Monster, one of the most common questions is…so what do we do? Thankfully, there are many great programs out now to help safeguard our kids’ hearts and minds when it comes to Technology.  We try to write about them regularly on Technology Tuesday’s!  

The issue with filters and monitoring services is wanting something that can take the hassle out of it for you.  It’s just hard to find time to be on top of technology, while the kids around us seem to find all of the time in the world.  So, we do our best to take the guesswork out of it at raisingboysandgirls.com and help you find your way to helpful, safe, user-friendly platforms to protect your home and family...

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Facilitating Christmas

I am surprised every year as I talk to children of all ages around the holidays about how they do and don’t experience Christmas.  I’m surprised about the entitlement that has swept through the culture of children today.  But I’m not surprised about how the two correlate.

First of all, we believe it is very important for your family to be about giving this season.  We think it is a fantastic opportunity for kids to be a part of what Christmas looks like walked out…at soup kitchens, sponsoring and buying gifts for a family...

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Talking to Girls about Puberty

My 9 year-old daughter is already acting like a teenager.  When should I expect things to start to change with her, and when do I need to talk to her about puberty and sex?

The answer to all these questions is “Yes.”  You need to talk to her.  Actually, you need have conversations with her all along the way, just as David mentioned regarding boys...  

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Technology Tuesday: Pornography & Masturbation

Take a look at these resources, and how we can make technology work for the adolescents and young adults we care about.

1.  Brain Buddy App   www.brainbuddyapp.com

    Enough silent suffering.

    It's time to get back to rebuild your life.

    The result of over 3000 hours of patient study, Brain Buddy rewires your brain to how it was before you got hooked on porn...

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