“Welcome Home. When are you leaving?”
A Parent’s Guide to Boomerang Kids - Part 2
Prevent the Comeback: How to prepare high school kids not to become boomerang kids
- Parent with a long view. Let the decisions you make on a daily basis be for more than the here and now. Worry less about raising happy kids and more about raising responsible, resilient, resourceful kids.
- Identify areas for reduced support. Where could you take a step back to allow for great independence – financial, relational, or logistical support? Having your child do their own laundry, setting their own alarm in the mornings rather than waking them up, paying for their own car insurance or managing a debit card through online banking.
- Nurture an independent learner. While most schools allow for checking grades online, avoid the tendency to do so on a daily basis. Too much academic involvement creates dependent learners... READ MORE
Why are so many kids moving back home and can’t seem to navigate college life? What can we be doing along the way to prepare kids to succeed once they move out of the house?
“Can anyone guess the age most developmental theorists agree adolescence ends for a male?”
I pose this question in a parenting class I teach on Understanding Boys. I break boy development into five stages and walk parents through the developmental shifts boys experience as they transition from boyhood to adult manhood. I’ve never asked the question that at least someone didn’t yell out “forty-five!” The room erupts into laughter as we all envision some adult male we know who acts like an adolescent boy. I respond that it’s earlier than forty-five but likely later than imagined. Most theorists agree adolescence ends for a girl somewhere around 19-20. For boys it’s years later - somewhere around 22-24. Our current generation may cause us to adjust those numbers even more in the coming years.
Approximately 18 million young adults ages 18-34 now live at home, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. This is a 42% increase since 1970. Understanding these numbers has become more a part of our national conversation in recent years. We are working to explain the “Failure to Launch” phenomena, to prevent “boomerang” kids, and to better assess the needs of these “emerging adults.”
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