Talking to Girls about Puberty

My 9 year-old daughter is already acting like a teenager.  When should I expect things to start to change with her, and when do I need to talk to her about puberty and sex?

The answer to all these questions is “Yes.”  You need to talk to her.  Actually, you need have conversations with her all along the way, just as David mentioned regarding boys...  

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At what age should I begin talking with my son about sex?

My answer is start now.  Whatever the age of your son, jump into that conversation.  If he’s young, begin talking more... about how God designed his body as a boy.  If he’s knocking on the door of adolescence, you’ll need to accelerate the conversation, and explore the possibility that he has been educated (or miseducated) by his peers.   

Here are three rules of engagement as you move into the conversation at any point in your son’s life...

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A Great (and Protective) Resource for Parents of Young Children: God Made All of Me

In our book, Modern Parents, Vintage Values, we talk about the issue of “stranger danger.”  It comes up regularly during the Q&A portion of parenting seminars.  Suffice it to say stranger danger doesn’t help.  What does help is empowering kids.  It helps to, with great warmth and strength, help them know what to do when they’re afraid or uncomfortable…and exactly how to do it.

God Made All of Me does a beautiful job empowering kids to do just that.  It, in a very approachable and age-appropriate way explains sexual abuse to kids.  It gives them words and actions to use any time they’re confronted with something or someone that makes them feel uncomfortable...  

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Technology Tuesday: bitmoji

Want to surprise your teenager?  Use your own bitmoji!

We’re always advocates of staying ahead of the game with your kids in terms of technology.  It’s no easy task.  That’s why we have Technology Tuesday’s…to keep you in the know so you can keep your kids safe.  And, from time to time, we want to keep you in the know so you can have a little fun with your kids...

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Why Is My Teenage Daughter So Angry: Part 2

Last week, we talked about the emotional world of teenage girls.  Here are just a few of the statistics:

According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse

  • Illicit drug use has declined significantly since its peak years in 1996 and 1997
  • Alcohol use among teenagers has also decreased since that time
  • Alcohol, however, is still the most widely used drug among young people
  • Marijuana and tobacco use have remained the same since that time
  • The use of prescription drugs such as Ritalin, Vicodin and OxyContin have increased
  • The use of inhalants has increased

From Anorexia Nervosa and Related Eating Disorders, Inc. (ANRED)                                           

  • The Journal of Abnormal Psychology reported that 14 to 39 percent of adolescents participate in some kind of self-harming behavior
  • Eating disorders affect almost 5 percent of young women in America
  • 1 percent of female adolescents are anorexic
  • 1 to 3 percent of middle and high school girls are bulimic
  • 15 percent of young women have unhealthy attitudes and behaviors about food

As we said before girls fall apart often from the outside in.  They develop struggles such as eating disorders, self-mutilation, addictions to drugs and alcohol, and other issues as a way to numb—or control this newfound pain that feels so out of their control.  Each of these issues warrants a different response, but each comes from the same source—an intense dislike, or self-hatred, of the girls themselves.  How do we help, as adults who love them? READ MORE

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Q&A: The Birds and the Bees Talk

Q and A:  We are often asked by parents . . . when should I have the Birds & Bees conversation with my kids?  Here are some thoughts to consider and some resources to check out. 

How to Talk to your Kids about Sex

When my (David) daughter was six and her twin brothers were four, I took them to the hospital to see a friend’s new baby. On the drive, I retold all three of my children the stories of their own births. I should have predicted what I was getting myself into. 

From the back of the car, my little girl asked, “How did the doctor get me out of Mommy’s tummy?” I responded with, “Well, that’s a great question.” (What I was actually thinking was, Where is your mom right now? I had no intention of educating our children on the nature of labor and delivery by myself)...READ MORE

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