Talking With Teenagers

With parents of teenagers, I have two words I repeat over and over in my counseling office:  empathy and questions.  Basically, we talk at teenagers way too much.  We lecture more than have conversations.  And conversations are honestly what they need most.  Conversations help them connect the dots, rather than us connecting the dots for them.  And our dots won’t lead them into adulthood or carry them into college.  They need to learn…

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Expect Teens Part 2 (and Still for Teens)

As we talked about last week, we would say the words expect and respect have quite a bit to do with each other in the world of teenagers.

1) Expect them to speak to you civilly.  They will have an attitude.  They will roll their eyes from time to time.  And, often, teens don’t know how to express their frustration respectfully.  They need your help...

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How Do I Talk to my Daughter About Sex and Masturbation?

For many girls, there is a sense of shame bound up in being a woman. As a mother, you may be lost for how to talk to her about it.

Girls don’t want you to tell them about what’s changing about their bodies. They don’t want you to talk about sex. They become awkward, walk away, and even resort to toddler tactics like plugging their ears and humming loudly.

We could talk at length about the origins of shame for girls. In the Fall, a significant part of Satan’s curse attacked our identities as women: “Then he said to the woman, ‘I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you’” (Genesis 3:16).

Media has, historically, valued women consistently and primarily for their appearance and sex appeal. And it’s only gotten worse.

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Technology Tuesday: What's Trending for Teenagers?

“What is my teenager actually doing on their phone?”

“She’s not looking at me.  What is she looking at?”

“It’s not only hard to talk to him when he’s holding his phone…it’s hard to know what he’s up to.”

“All I know is when she puts her phone down, she seems really discouraged.  What has this kind of power over my daughter?”

These are all questions we hear from concerned parents of teens every day…and ones that are definitely worth asking.  This article outlines what adolescents are doing on their phones and, therefore, the apps and sites we need to know about as the adults who love them.

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Technology Tuesday: App Alert - Snapbox

We talked in a recent blog about snapchat, where your child can send pictures that are available for the recipient to see from 1 to 10 seconds after the picture is opened.  Obviously, it lends itself to plenty of concerns for parents and plenty of temptations for teens (or even younger children).  We would recommend being very aware of the apps your child downloads.  You can either check their phone or tablet regularly or have them download through your own itunes account.  Or both. 

A new app that I just heard about is called Snapbox.  It is described as “a snaphack for snapchat... READ MORE

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